Reader Question:

My ex is actually an on-again, off-again fan who says they are “done” with me. Yet the guy puts a stop to by my workplace of working nearly every time to inquire about some lame concern or kid myself about something. Beyond work he can perhaps not reply to any texts or e-mail, so I don’t send them anymore. Sadly, I adore him and he knows it.

If he has got given up on united states, why does the guy drop by my personal office? If they haven’t, precisely why will he perhaps not chat to me personally outside work?

-Lucinda (North Carolina)

Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Answer:

Dear Lucinda:

Your ex partner is connected but not happy to take time to buy an union along with you.

His check-ins in the office are designed to help him maintain exposure to you and maybe even maintain the intimate doors open. But they have managed to get clear he doesn’t want a relationship anymore. He is told you that.

These mixed emails and flirting are probably driving you bananas, and that means you’ve have got to end up being the someone to erect boundaries.

When he puts a stop to by your office, be really active and distracted. Transfer of area as much as possible. And, first and foremost, have no intercourse with him!

My hunch: he’s providing you incorrect hope because he would like to manage to have on-again intercourse often. 

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